Caught In The Headlights by Barry K. Phillips

Caught In The Headlights
10 Lessons Learned The Hard Way
By: Barry K. Phillips
Paperback: 116 pages
Publisher: Cedar Fort (June 2, 2008)

As the title indicates - and a perfectly fitting title for this work, I may add - many of us would be struck dead in our tracks with the realization that what we once thought most important in our lives, really may not be so. Or, perhaps, a more fitting way of wording the prior statement would be that many of us go about things a bit differently than we should. If we were to step back and re-evaluate what we really want out of life, there just may be a way to go about getting it, or something similar, but actually end up getting even more than we bargained for in the end.
In Caught In The Headlights, Mr. Phillips discusses ten key areas that everyone, or most everyone, experiences in life. These are as follows:

1) Happiness
2) Self-Esteem
3) Pride
4) Freedom
5) Control
6) Tolerance
7) Forgiveness
8) Success
9) The Big Event
10) The Perfect Body

In each section, the author discusses his personal experiences and how he came to realize what each of these things truly mean - not just by definition, or general public ideas/knowledge - but by delving within not only self, but soul searching truth. Mr. Phillips presents his findings in not only a knowledgeable way, but one filled with great humor and interest. He ends each section with what I consider a “summary poem”. I loved this and thought it was very clever. Also, at the beginning of each section, the reader will find a hand drawn cartoon from the author. I think of these cartoons as “humor truth”. Meaning they present a truth of our society, which many overlook, in a humorous and fun way. I loved these, as well.

While reading Caught In The Headlights, I found myself agreeing, on many points, with the author. I was especially interested in Mr. Phillips take on true happiness. Often, it is difficult to not think of happiness as that burst of excitement, or rush that one receives when something great happens. I feel that many times, that may be how addictions start - needing to feel that “rush” again and again, which we associate with happiness. However, as the author states, this is more describing of pleasure. How easy it is to mix the two up. While Mr. Phillips settles on peace as the truth of happiness, I would agree, but also attach contentment to that. This is the theme of Caught In The Headlights. Much of what we think we desire and want in life, is actually something else entirely.

In summary, at least in my opinion, the book shows how many people in today’s society, are so utterly single minded and suffering from extreme tunnel vision, whether they may realize it or not. Life has become so heartbreakingly fast paced, that many lose sight of what is truly important. It is not ourselves that bring forth true happiness, success and freedom, but it is what we do for those around us. We, as a people, are very important, yes, but it is what we do for others that makes the most impact. By helping others, we in turn help ourselves and bring positive impact into our own lives. This will then bring into our own lives, true happiness, self-esteem, pride, freedom, control, tolerance, forgiveness, success, and pleasure in a possible forth-coming big event. As far as the perfect body goes, well, as long as we take care of ourselves, to the best of our ability, by eating well and physical activity, our bodies will thank us for it greatly. As the old saying goes - a healthy mind and a healthy body go hand in hand.

Caught In The Headlights is a short and to the point book, filled with great advice. It is presented in a fun to read way and is a book that everyone would do well to read. Barry K. Phillips blends together many talents - self-help advice, poetry, cartoon illustrating and excellent humor. I advise everyone to grab a copy of this and even have a highlighter handy to highlight those not to be missed points!

After reading Caught In The Headlights, I had the wonderful opportunity to ask Mr. Phillips a few questions:

~~First of all, I have to say that I loved the book! It was both insightful and a great pleasure to read. What reason did you have for settling on these particular ten things?

Barry: Thanks. I was amazed at how many people have dealt with these same issues, but so many never figure out how to learn the lessons. You know the old adage, "if you keep doing what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." Breaking the cycle of repeating the same old things is pretty hard to do, so I thought others might benefit from what I've learned. These 10 seemed to be the most common.

~~ Was writing something that you always had a desire to do?

Barry: Yes. I've always loved to write. I've even owned a computer magazine, just so I could write. It took a while to get the confidence to write a book, plus in the case of Caught in the Headlights, I needed enough life experience to learn the lessons taught in the book.

~~ With your excellent wit and knowledge, would you ever consider coming out from behind the written page and form your own television commentary show or radio show?

Barry: Can I quote you on the first part of that sentence to my family? I can't believe someone would want me to do that. Actually, that sounds like a lot of fun, but it's nothing I've considered seriously. I'm not exactly connected for that kind of thing, but I'm sure if the opportunity ever came up, I'd be very interested.

LOL, you certainly may quote me - though keep in mind, this is from a complete "book knowledge" rather than personal knowledge, lol.

~~ If you had to pick the biggest life lesson, that you have learned so far in life, what would that be?

Barry: That you don't have to be the very best in the world at something, you just have to be the best that you can be. There's always some one better. And, you'll miss the real valuable things in life if you focus on some worldly pursuit. The world does not applaud the best parents, spouses, or those that honor God the best they can, but those things are the most important.

I love that thought - it's one that everyone should take the time to remember, I think.

~~ I had read somewhere that you have another book in the works. What does it focus on? When is it slated for release?

Barry: I am writing a second book at the moment. I haven't fleshed it all out yet so I don't want to spill the beans as to the subject matter. I do plan on it being full of humor… at least I'll think it's funny. I hope to have a rough draft complete in the next 3 or 4 months.

That's wonderful! I know that I will be anxious to read it, when it is complete, as I'm sure many will be.

~~ What are five goals that you have for yourself and have you accomplished them yet?

Barry: Most of the big ones are done. Writing this book was one of them. Of course, getting wife and having kids has happened. But I'm still working on figuring out how to just write full time – while still being able to eat.

~~ Ok, how about some fun quickie questions:

~~ Favorite food?

Barry: Three favorites… chocolate, chocolate and um, chocolate.

Ahhhh, a person after my own heart!! I am still in disbelief that chocolate is not one of the main foods in the food pyramid!

~~ Favorite thing to do on the weekends?

Barry: Hot-air ballooning, writing, and as little as possible otherwise.

~~ Favorite author/books to read?

Barry: C.S. Lewis is one of my favorites. I like biographies of interesting people, and things that have a lot of humor in them. I must also admit I loved the Harry Potter series.

I love the Harry Potter series also. It is what got me hooked onto YA novels - at the age of 34, lol!

~~ Favorite movies/t.v. shows?

Barry: Favorite movies… Ghost Busters, Independence Day, Gettysburg. How's that for eclectic? As for T.V. shows, reruns of Hogan's Hero's and Home Improvement, as well as Overhaulin' – I'm a car guy.

Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my questions. Most importantly, thank you for taking the time to share yourself and your advice through this excellent book! I wish you much success!

Barry: Thanks April!

Everyone, please be sure to check out Barry's book: Caught In The Headlights - 10 Lessons Learned the Hard Way. It has great advice for everyone and will be sure to bring a smile to your face and repeated laughs!! Click here to visit Barry K. Phillips' website and learn more about Barry and keep up to date on future happenings!